And Changes I Did Make!....

I did not think when I said there were going to be upcoming changes, that it would occur so soon. Like 12 hours later, soon.

I've been dealing with some very unethical behaviour from the management team at my current  last job. The manager has no professionalism whatsoever. Belittles the staff openly without shame, conspires theories as to why a person is "really" off work.  You could be bleeding, and she would claim you were being deceitful.

I'll leave you with the very short and most important piece of information, as why I choose to leave there. I do not believe she knows how text messages work. Yesterday she sent a text that was meant for another co-worker, however it was sent to me. It was about me... yup. Classy eh?

At first I almost mentioned that I received a text from her, as she was going on, and on, about how something weird was going on with her phone etc. Thankfully the filter between my brain and mouth kicked in full force. Read the text, locked my phone, and stewed for the rest of the day, and evening. Although my gut first reaction was to reply to the text, and walk out.

I applied to a job last night. Long story short, I was offered the position today. Upon arriving home from the interview, I wrote a very curt resignation letter regarding the unethical behaviour as my reason etc, cc'ing the HR, and President.  Another email was sent to HR with a detailed break down of events that occurred in the last two months. None of which really affected me, except two recent events. I took a picture of the text with my web cam, and copied it into the email as proof.

If there is anything I've learned having been unemployed, and/or temping the majority of this year, is there are a lot of shitty people out there. More so interesting that I've learned not to put up with it. How many jobs have I had this year? How many did I, up and walk away from?

The Employment Lords were smiling down on me last night and today. Thank You, Thank You, Thank You. This job is a score! It's structured, professional, close to home, full benefits, and the wages, well they're great too. 

Thank You Employment Lords. Thank You.

Again, really?

I just can't seem to catch a break. It's going to be a long year. *sigh*

Exploring options. Maybe making a huge change in direction. Details to follow.

On the other hand, IT'S THE WEEKEND!!!!

Hope you all have a great one and do something fun. I'll be napping. Yup, napping.

Cos napping is FUN!

When to be strong? When to step in? When to walk away?

It's been brought to my attention that a pub acquaintance of mine is bi-polar. I'm not close with *P*, although I enjoy her a lot when I see her at the gigs.

She's been paying all sort of attention to my FB page in the past couple months. I noticed some quirkiness about her, and concern in the fact she seemed to be airing her laundry about mutual friends on her wall. Made me wonder if she truly understood how fb works. (she's only been on for a few months). Nonetheless, she's attached herself to me lately.

A couple pub friends contacted me in the last 36 hrs to inform me of some recent *P* antics of late. Upon picking up my jaw off the floor, learning of the violent outbreaks, assaults on some of friends, (one being on a very pregnant wife of her main obsession), pending court dates resulting from charges being pressed from establishments we frequent, and lastly a recent short stay in the hospital over the July long weekend. Needless to say, I'm shocked.

Shocked and saddened more so by her so-called-friends. Aside from her bestfriend, who is educated/trained to deal with mental illness, he's gone to the police himself to see if he could do anything. Unfortunately until she hurts herself or another, there is nothing they can do. He's informed a few of us, it's best if we keep our distance and be thankful she does not have our addresses! (sounding a little like Crazy C?). It's worse. It's more like single white female I'm learning. :(

People have bailed on her. No one is staying strong for her, banning together to get her some help, or back on her meds. They've abandoned her. Okay the pregnant friend and the main source of her obsession, have reason to be wary and stay away. But the rest? It got me to thinking how wrong I was, how things looked. I was always lead to believe she was a close friend of many of these people. I was wrong.

I'm sad for her. I decided that I would offer an ear and just be someone she could lean on from a distance (only cos I live 2 hours by bus away). Only to learn she's blocked me from fb last night.  We weren't "friends", but acquaintances.  Should she reach out to me, I will be of what assistance I can, and tell her what others are afraid to say to her with as much kindess and open heart as I can.

I had to run this past a few friends. They reminded me, not everyone has had the exposure to mental illness that I have. They may not know how to communicate with her, , or even how to react. Hense they've appeared to abandon her.  Mostly due to being unsure and/or scared.  Fair enough. I need to give them the benefit of doubt, as much as I do her. Don't get me wrong, I'm not going to insert myself where I don't belong, until I'm asked.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

In other news.....

I'm hoping injecting myself into a public situation, and actions, will have changed the course of a young life forever.

On my way home from the hospital for a small procedure (just stomach stuff, I'm good), waiting for the bus at a skytrain, I'm sat beside a young girl looking miffed, and a young boy (about 14 yrs of age) pacing, muttering words as he passed us. I took out an earbud to hear what he was saying. Was he was talking to me, to her, to us etc?? It appeared he was talking to her. Verbally abusing her.  I struck up a small conversation with this girl, asking what this was about, and the things he was saying to her was verbal abuse. She had called him an asshole for something douchy he did earlier. He'd been verbally berating her since.

He yelled at me to mind my own business. Laughing at him there wasn't a chance in hell, as this clearly wasn't a private conversation and that he's berating her in public. Embarrassed, a single tear falling down her face, that said it all.

As he passed us again, I got up, linked my arm with his, smiling and said HI! Taking control of the laps he'd been doing. Looking at me in utter shock, swearing at me to take my hands off him, calling me all sorts of names. I held his arm tighter, signally him to listen, continued to walk with him. I had words with him. Asking him all sort of questions how he'd feel if a guy spoke to his mum or sister this way etc. He said he'd kill them. Smirking at him, I told him how being a stranger, I'd like to kick his ass for his poor behaviour. He started to calm down alittle realizing I was serious, and much stronger than him as I still had a strong grip on his arm as we're walking in laps. In the mean time we'd attracted a small crowd of on-lookers who were witness to commotion earlier. When I was done having words, I told him to go stand over the other way, by the bus they were waiting for.

Sat beside his g/f again, giving her the best advise I could. Begging her not to get on a bus with him, that I'd wait with her if she called someone to come get her, or wait for a different bus etc, anything, just not to get on a bus with him, otherwise she was telling him this behaviour was okay, and that she thought it was okay to be treated this way.

She lightly cried, mentioning she broke up with him etc, and he just wouldn't stop. I explained as kindly and sternly as I could that what he was doing is verbal abuse, and he's so young. Imagine how much worse this will get as he gets older.

He's pacing in front of us again, although a little further away this time, still in ear shot. I told her if she was serious about putting an end to this, to call his parents and inform them of how he's talking too, treating her etc. Not expecting her to do it now, it was food for thought; a moment later she picked up her phone and called his Mum!!!

...."Hi Mrs Blah Blah"....she starts. He charges over to her (I put myself between them, and a few people have walked closer to us sensing this might get ugly) screaming at her in shock "Are you calling my mum? You dumb fucking bitch"... I had to contain my laughter when she stood up with conviction, gave him the finger, and walked away!!!
With the small crowd we'd drawn, he knew better than to follow her. He got on a bus a few moments later, muttering all sorts of curses at himself, her, me, and whoever he felt deserved it. I tailed behind her to be sure she got on a train. She smiled shyly, with a wave that said thank you.

Wondering if I had done the right thing, or if I'd made it worse. Called up LC immediately explaining what happened, and my actions. LC said I probably changed the course of that girls life forever, and maybe his too.

People are too afraid to get involved anymore. I realized, that it was everything that LC had been thru, what her girls will probably go thru as a result of their abusive father, that caused me to react the way I did and get involved. Now, had they been adults, would I have done the same thing? I'm not sure. Knowing this kid couldn't physically harm me, it seemed okay. Pick your battles right?

Who Needs Sleep?? Not me.

lol I haven't slept a solid night since the roommate went away for work. He'll be gone 3 weeks. Home for a week, gone for another 10 days, home 2 weeks and gone again for 2 weeks. I won't really see him until October.

I've noticed this pattern with other people staying or living with me. If anyone is gone for an extended period of time, I tend not to sleep well, at all. I usually settle down after the first week has past, however this time, not so.

The apartment is making new noises in the early evening and after I've turned out the lights. We both noticed these noises about a month ago. Apparently I'm not completely on crack, or have gone crazy! The bangs, knocks, noises tend to sound like someone trying the door to the apartment. Once so convincing so, the roommate charged out of his room to the front door, opened it, intending to give whomever it was trying to get in, an ear full. No one was there. Another are the new footsteps on the roof of the building. There is a distinctive difference between the raccoon, birds walking across than their is a human. Only at night.

Not to mention the interesting, slight disturbing dreams I've been having. They're not nightmares, yet, although they're not nice. = no sleep.

Work Update:
A few things have happened in the past week that have made me question how long I'll actually stay there. I estimate I'll stay til after Christmas then start to seriously look elsewhere.

Without giving the intimate details of the questionable behaviour taking place, (I suspect my two bosses read this blog).... All I can say is; it will be next to impossible to confide and/or trust the management from this point moving forward.

The position itself if great. It's challenging at the moment, simply cos I've yet to wrap my head around my own position, whilst having to learn the tasks of another person at the same time. At the moment, I am 98% on my own. No one to fall back on, or ask questions while the management is away on holidays. If I mess it up, it will remain messed up. I won't sweat it. I'm doing the best I can, based on the limited time I've had to become confident with the things I put my name on.

Aside from all that. Life is pretty good. Only minor things to complain about.

Accutane Update:
My face... LOOKS FRIGGIN AWESOME! Even the hormonal breakouts I have, have minimized! Took long enough. :) Don't have to wear makeup to cover anything up, other than bags under my eyes lol.

Boys:
Nothing to mention at the moment.

That is all. :)

I don't NEED to see.... do I? New Glasses.

Apparently I'm blind. Upon my recent eye examination, it appears I've gone from far sighted, to both, near and far. Resulting in TWO pairs of glasses.

Did you know there is a difference between reading & computer glasses? I did not.
Why can't I just continue to wear my farsighted eye wear and carry along?

I'm in between needing two pairs and requiring progressives. Ugh.
I really didn't think I needed a new prescription at all. Until I put on the new farsighted. Whola, I can see!

The "reading" glasses I think are a crock right now. I"m giving them a week to adjust as per the request of the doctor. After that, I can decide if I want to change them to "computer", keep the "reading" or scrap the both and go with progressive.

Apparently this is quite normal to have this discouragement about change.

I would love to hear from those of you who wear glasses, and have gone thru a similar experience, what to expect, what not too, suggestions, input in general.

Thanks!

One of My Sisters....

One of my sisters has been having a hard time finding a new family doctor. This has caused her enormous amounts of stress as she has MS, along with being on a cocktail of medications for various ailments.

She called me a few weeks ago to advise she'd been in the hospital for a brain hemorrhage, as she fell after the cat got between her legs and hit her head on the coffee table and almost bled out. First, I wasn't impressed that NO ONE called me until after the fact, at my sister "JC" request. She explained that she had been coming off some of her medication on her own, had some choice words for the cat just before she fell.

Thankfully the neighbour upstairs hear a lot of out of character noise from her apartment, called the cops, who found my sister bleeding out on the living room floor.

The day before the long weekend, I received a call from JC's husband. Advising that my sister was in the hospital again. After asking the appropriate questions, I learned she'd been having many manic episodes. Her husband found JC hunched over him at 3am, hissing and trying to bite him. WTF! He called an ambulance, having her admitted.

We talked for about an hour, reassuring him, he did the right thing, saved her life.
As it tuns out, she's been having a few manic episodes, and came off a life time of medication on her, waaaaaay to fast, and had a pyschotic break, from withdrawing too quickly. Landing her under observation for the long weekend. Immobilized, and when allowed outside, put into a straight jacket. Yes they still have those. Which I completely understand, as at that point she was a risk to herself and the professionals helping her.

Turns out she's been lying about her ailments for sometime, and was more self medicating to block out physical pain, along with a life time of memories of her childhood and abuse under my biological fathers hand.

A blessing in disguise. She will be entering rehab within the week for anywhere from 7-40 days. At which time, I've been handed the responsibility of calling all our family and informing them. She will be unreachable. No calls, no visits.  She's getting a second chance at life. They will educate her about sobriety. And for those of you who do not know, being sober, is sober of all narcotics. You can not choose to be sober from drugs and still drink, or visa versa. Sober is sober,from everything. I really hope they drive that point home to her, and that she gets it.  Although if she doesn't recover from this psychosis, she will likely be medicated the rest of her life.

Out of all my siblings, ( I have 5 of them), this is NOT the sister I thought would snap.

I spoke with her yesterday, and she's in denial. However, she is unaware that I know the truth of her situation.  She sounds slightly off, and subdued. Her husband suspects she's had minor brain damage from the last episode.  Could very well be.

I've had a lot of thoughts in the past week. First I was pissed at her for lying to me, instead of reaching for help. After all I've had my bout with mental illness too. Then realizing, like any addict, she didn't see anything wrong with her life, and pain management.

That's what I've been wrapping my head around lately.

Work is still good, and coming along nicely. Boys are still ridiculous liars. I'm doing something about my weight. :) However my stomach issues have been flaring up. To the point of exhaustion and seeking medical attention. I have an appointment with a specialist on the 23rd, I've been waiting 6 months for. Will be glad to discover what is causing the new flare ups. Food hates me in general these days.