Profile Picture & Second to last night with JV.

Before we start...

My new profile picture was taken from Cypress Bowl Mountain in Vancouver, BC.
(30 minutes from my house) While it was 15 degree's on the mountain, and gorgeous!!!. Down below all that fog (for 10 days) it was 3 degree's and miserable. Visibility ZERO!

But what a picture!!! I hope they find the photographer!

So its been a tense week at home, as the roommate is getting ready to leave.
He's had loud parties, almost had me evicted, and has started lying where lying wasn't warranted.

Last night was no different. I had a rough day and came home to enjoy the silence.
JV had a date over... ugh. I like this girl but my gawd is she loud. the were "one upping" each other in volume and talking over the already loud TV while watching hockey.

At 10pm I asked that they go to another room, so I could relax, unwind etc before going to bed in an hour.... (such a mum thing to say and we laughed about it...)
They SAID okay, but what they must have heard was..Go on the patio make as much noise as humanly possible, then go to bed and take it to a super sonic level.

at midnight I was short of throwing myself on the ground and crying from pure exhaustion.
I yelled at JV to come out, and he apologized after seeing how close to tears I was.... that worked for all of 5 mins.

On the suggestion of a great PR friend, he said in the morning as I leave the house, flip the breaker switch. :) That will reset his alarm clock to a blinking 00:00 *giggle*

Got up at 6am.
I found earplugs and I think they pipped down around 5 am..... Wood frame building + roommate = Shhhhhhhhh

I made as much noise as I possibly could.
Slamming cupboards, doors, stomping my feet, and I even managed to fall into his door with a very loud crash. .. In my defense this isn't normally my character, I'm more than reasonably respectful 99% of the time.... but when pushed to the limits and repeatedly asked for some quiet on top of tension my life... I snapped.

As I walked out the door, I could hear his date snoring, so I KNEW they had finally fallen asleep and flipped the breaker. :) yes I just stepped into the Evil pool, and I kind of like it. I'm feeling mighty smug right now. I'm sure Karma will bite me later, but COME ON!!!

JV moves out tomorrow after work and I couldn't be happier. He has been making nice all week. I had minor surgery on Monday and Sunday while I had to do a purging cleanse, he was sweet.
But I have to remind myself of the things I learned about him in the past weeks.

For all the complaining I do, we really do get along well.
Any small space is going to equal some frustrations. Although in the bigger picture, they are minor... just annoying as hell when they are taking place.

I'm going to start making my place more of a home for now, than an apartment that is serving a purpose. :)

Thank You My Friends- Going to Rock the ass off 2009!!! Who's In?

Goodbye Old Blog, Hello new One.
(posting from old blog)

Hi all!
Just wanted to stop in and post a quick hello..
I haven’t written here in a while, cos well, this is my angry, shoot from the hip reaction blog.... I've started a new one that is more comical and about where I am now.

I'm happy people. HAPPY! Yes I said it.

After blogging my angst on here for how many years.... I’ve found a spot in my life surrounded by a good job, with people I like (ok well they don’t annoy the living crap out of me) its a start lol, better friends, re-invented myself and started to be the change I wanted to see.

I like me. FINALLY!

I really had to hit an all time bottom low and get a taste of myself from another person, just too see how much I don’t like that type of person, and what was I going to do about it?

I had to make same hard decisions. Its was now about me. Not whether or not I was going to hurt someone and be afraid if they were going to be mad or hate me.... didn’t care anymore.

I slowly examined the friendships of others and asked how do I get that!?.... Loyalty, love, real friends, not those who are only around to gain something then gone once they have it. (Even though those people come and go from our lives, there is always a lesson to be learned from them) And now..... I have the beginning of those things. I treat my friends with a different level of respect (always had respect for them) but it’s different... I’ve stopped that "a woe is me, I'm wounded" stage of my life and started being the age I am.

Dating has changed too. Really changed. Again. I had to ask why I keep hooking up and attracting only losers. Well it was simple. I had no standards for myself. As much as I’d like to think I did, I never stood up for what I believed in, wanted from a man. I just let them in my life cos it beat the crap out of being lonely, and alone. It was an empty feeling.

Granted I realize I am human and will have moments of weakness, but I can not express enough to you how much I like where I am. Who I am. Who I want to be. Those I want to be with me.

A friend recently wrote a posting on her facebook about her 2008, and it was truly inspiring. With that posting I again realized, I'm allowed to be weak, make mistakes, gain, lose, learn, live, love, and laugh, even if it’s only at myself.

For all of you who have stood by me, when I drank too much, cried too much, laughed at inappropriate things, ranted on and on and on about nothing...

I thank you.
From the bottom of my heart.
Without all of you this work in progress would have taken a whole lot longer.

Much Love Xxx

Good Riddance and First Time a Wing Woman.

Not sure where to begin.
My first entry stated that I have had very little drama in my life.

Since JV has moved in, I’ve been constantly questioned about my intentions, and if I’m canoodling a scheme with his ex girlfriend, to get back at him for cheating on her.

FIRST OF ALL! You weenie, I’m the one you cheated on her with!
(At the time I didn’t know he had a live in g/f) in any case why would I side with her when we’re building a rapport as friends?

Received my first serious complaint from the land lord about a party JV had this weekend til 6 AM! Umm not cool, we’re 36 not 16. Normally I probably wouldn’t care, but I like my neighbours and we watch out for each other. I have to do some damage control this week.

And more so, JV is moving out. Until yesterday I was sad about this news.
However, without giving details as this is a public blog. Turns out he has not been honest about anything and apparently has been miserable from day one.
I thought we were pals, could even be friends. But knowing what I’ve learned.
I couldn’t happier to see him go.

I thought about confronting him on what I now know, then thought…. really? Why bother?
The end result will still be the same. We’re not friends, nor will we ever be.
I don’t need friends like that; I wouldn’t treat my enemies that way.
I’ve deleted his number, and facebook from my account, and the second he hands over the keys to me when he moves out, I’m deleting and blocking his ass from my email account. FOREVER!

I’m surprised at myself and how well I’m dealing with it. I honestly thought I might dwell over it and try to work things out, cos everyone knows, I need more local friends. But no. I made a very healthy decision without much thought really. I’m not even mad. Being mad would imply that I care. I’m impressed with my own resilience in all this.

Okay – First time a Wing-woman!

I went out to see the amazing Adam Woodall Band Friday night. The band consist of Adam Woodall himself, (and Rosco band) Jesse tucker (Jessie Ferrell Band), Jesse Goodin (Jessie Ferrell Band) and Dave Hall (AWB & Rosco Bands).

The band always puts on a good show and plays a few times a week in a variety of venues.
People are always super friendly and mixed crowd of 19-50 year olds. Of course there is always one sour grape in the bunch, but usually overlooked while scoping out hot men and people watching or singing at the top of lungs along with the band in this small pub.

We go to these gigs, occasionally meet random people who end up becoming good friends over time. This night was no different. Before the night ends I've had a full pint spilled on me, then one bought for me. Hot firemen flirting with my friend, cos she yawned… in all it was a good night. I make one last trip to the loo before leaving and left my friend downstairs, when I came back a handful of very attractive firemen were telling us we must come to this other bar with them… umm OKAY! Why wouldn’t we?

We go, we get lost, we find the bar and the boys who seem sincere to see us.
Then head back to one of their apartments for a night cap. (Very out of character for me).
Funny thing is, the man flirting with my friend earlier is the one I’m connecting with.
Not sure when we traded off on them, or if they traded off.
Strong Scot accent and witty as all hell and mighty quick too… I couldn’t stop laughing.
It’s been three days and my cheeks still hurt.

It was becoming clear to me that my friend and this guy were getting a little “too cozy” so
I asked the one if he’d like some privacy with my friend, he lit up like a tree, YES MA”AM!
So I grabbed the wing man and told him we were moving into another room to give them some privacy, and ended up getting some smooches myself. Til *yawn* 7am.
So the wing man and wing-woman hook up. Giggle. Well not quite but we had a good time.

We had a good time for such a random night.
We’ve heard from these men since then, and may see them again if not at another AWB gig.

If anything, I’ve had more drama than I know what to do with.

and i'm not sure why this post looks the way it does after I publish it... weird.

Roommate-less, Finding a Boyfriend.

I've had a rough couple days. My oldest sister who is slightly mentally and physically disabled, has learned she has a "growth" in her intestines. So having learned that in the last couple days and then coming home today to learn my roommate is giving his notice!!!
Needless to say I'm a little bitchy.

Now he's taking it personally and acting like I'm being bitchy cos of him.
While getting his knickers in a knot, I tried telling him I do have OTHER things going on in my life. Sure, him giving me notice was just icing on the cake. He's convinced its all because he gave notice. ......I at first I tried to tell him otherwise, but its useless.

OF COURSE I want him to stay, he's a great roommate (although he's been acting a little "off" the last two weeks) and I like having a break in the rent.

So I took a bath to reflect this new information, immediately did my finances to make sure I"m still okay... I am. *phew* one less worry.

This is what I came up with.

Regardless of any nit-picking I COULD do, it comes down to this.
I'm sulking, mad, sad, and happy he's moving out, but the end result is I'm going to be alone again. I've been alone a long time, and until this past hour, I did not realize, I'm not just alone..... I'm lonely.

okay stop laughing.

I've lived alone for the majority of my life, and have enjoyed it. My space, my rules, my mess, having to answer to no one. etc... I've had male roommates, but never lived with a "boyfriend".
Instead of giving into his negative tude, I've decided to turn it into a positive.

Sooooooooooooo I've learned I'm ready to have a life with someone! Yup. Settle down!
I really like having someone to come home too, cook dinner, watch sports with, share my day with etc.

I'm ready.
Who knew having an a guy I dated briefly, who cheated on his g/f, live with me, could open my eyes to something so huge.

I'm 36, single, only minor baggage that could fit into a carry on bag, live alone, have a job, my own money (even if its very little) my own friends, a life of my own.

I want to start building a life with someone, together.

Okay as I read over this, it turns out its more of a rambling rant and not a statement that I was trying to make. But I'm sure you've gotten the picture.

So back to online dating, going out with almost anyone that asks me. Going to make some serious effort to find someone to date exclusively and not this "passing the time" with crap I've been doing.

I've dated about 40 men in the last 3 years and do you have any idea how many of those men were worthy of a second date, let alone worthy of dating exclusively?????
5. yes FIVE.

How many more frogs do I have to kiss, humour and reject before I find the one of MY dreams?

I have the face of the man I want.... just not the rest of him. sigh.

Input please.

sorry for being all over the place.

Ferret In the Apartment!!!

We had a little excitement in the apt on Friday night.
I kept hearing “tapclicktapclicktapclick” coming from the bathroom area, but couldn’t locate the source… it wasn’t raining so I knew it wasn’t the rain hitting the vents (same sound)

After a while, I was on the computer on the floor in the hallway and just happened to look up towards the bathroom and saw a FERRET!!!! In my bathroom!

I jumped up and screamed like a girl, threw a shoe at the patio door to get Jason’s attention.
When I told him what I saw, he actually asked me, “are you sure it wasn’t a spider?”

RIGHT!! I screamed like a girl and now I’m standing on a chair in the living room over a spider I could have squashed with a book? Weenie! IT’S IN YOUR ROOM!

He went to look and found nothing, he looked in mine, nothing.
Some time goes by and I can hear it scratching at Jason’s door.
I tell him I can hear it, but he thinks I’ve smoked some crack or something. Lol

Finally he hears the big “thug” against the door… grabs the broom and opens his door, walks in, and then steps back about two feet..
HOLY #*$^& THAT’S A FERRET!!!
SO I laughed and said, “Umm ya sure it isn’t some big spider eh?”

Hahahah, after it followed Jason around the apt, I learned it was my neighbours and there is a hole in her closet that leads under the heater board in Jason’s room.

No longer afraid of it, but holy crap! Until then we didn’t know if it was wild or not, we guessed it was domestic but still not touching it til we knew.

2008 Jan - Dec

Quick recap of my 2008….if you’re interested.

Jan – too long ago to remember.

Feb – Dr. Apt’s regarding my wussy stomach.
Had a 6 pack of my dad's favorite beer for his 4th yr anniversary of passing away.

March - Threw my back out picking up my slippers (Although the rumour at work has it, I threw it out having sex) …. Must have been one hell of a ploughing!!!

April – A friend left for Afghanistan for 8 months, to serve our country.

May – I think I cried all of May.... (See April).
Had a large bottle of wine for my mum's 8th year anniversary of passing away.

June – Turned 37, and freaked out that 40 is approaching and I might die alone!!!
EDIT : apparently I forgot how to count, born 1972, I'm 36 til THIS June. Then 37... lol good thing I'm cute.

July – Went to see the Tall Ships on the Island for my B-Day, got pink peek-a-poo streaks!

August – Reconnected with a dear road tripping, surfing friend, over a song that was claimed to be new, but was indeed 4 years old… (Jason Mraz’s “I’m your’s”) it’s an old song people!

Sept – Learned another dear friend will leave for Iraq come Feb 6, 2009 – for 9-12 months :(

Oct – Found out the guy I was casually dating had a live in g/f of two years....sigh, man can I pick them.
- Spent Thanksgiving in Saanich (Vancouver Island) with an amazing family, New Friends!!! Great hosts!

Nov – Found out I’ll be spending Xmas alone instead of being with my chosen family on the Island.

Dec – Took in a roommate (See Oct – Same guy)
Spent my first Xmas alone.
Had strep for the majority of the holidays.
New Years at a local pub with road tripping galpal and back home to bed.

Designers & Black Ice

I mentioned in one of my last entries that the Design Team was setting up Fall 09 in our show rooms

The great thing about this is when something available to purchase, and you’ve been staring at it for the better half of a year, when you get it, you can actually say… “That’s sooooooooo last year”.

We have one designer who creates the most fabulous sweaters, & cardigans.

Anything, seriously ANYTHING KB designs, I fall in love with. (Bonus that they fit my girthy body)
I was poking through the Fall 09 proto box, and found a MUST HAVE sweater….
KB gave the okay to purchase the Proto, when she brought it to me; she also brought down another sweater (mock pea coat jacket style) that I’ve been in love with from day 1. MADE MY DAY!

So now I have two pieces which are to die for, that are a one of a kind from an up and coming designer that no one will ever have! Unless of course they decide to use it for a different year.

There are perks for working for a large clothing designer and having the design & tech team in the same office. J

We had one designer last year who was majority talented. She was on Project Runway Canada, and made it to the top 5. However, once she was cut, she did give her notice here and went back to a couture designer to work on her specialty. Recently she had her first Spring 09 show with the L’Oreal Fashion Week in Toronto and did fantastic! We’re proud of CW and wish her the best of luck.

On the way to work, I bailed 3 separate times on black ice. I’ve been waiting for the trail along the train to clear of snow, so I would no longer have to take the cramped bus to work from the station and could enjoy the silence of the trail (it’s a wide open trail) I’m sure I’ll hurt tonight or even tomorrow, since I did bail pretty hard all three times, the last time I managed to hurl myself slightly into the snow bank to soften the blow. Ouch. The bruises will be colourful I’m sure.

New Layout TIme

Edit: Instead of hurting my brain looking for the perfect feminine background, in turn I've opted for a Floral Banner... Input Please.


Its time to try out a new lay out.

If anyone has something you'd think I'd like or LOVE, well send them my way.
I really like feminine and dainty backgrounds that are still reasonable simple and not overly busy.

Email me here with your idea, thought, or html code, and I'll giver a try.

Back To School 2009

I'm sitting at my desk with the showroom behind me as the designers have just finished setting up the Fall 09 displays for the buyers in the oncoming weeks.

WOW Fall 09 already?... Can we get through Winter 08/09 first please!
(for those who may not know, fashion is always a year ahead of itself in preparation of sales to buyers)

In short, that means its Sample Season. Which means its fairly busy for reception and everyone working on it.

Ok, my heading said Back To School and I'm talking about work/fashion.
My point being, this past Fall 08 I took a p/t univeristy course and passed. Just one course.
Never again will I go to school in the fall/winter. It's dark, ugly, classes run way to late etc... woes is me.

I've very recently been thinking about applying to position that may open up in sourcing/production/costing department. It could open up, anywhere from today to a few months from now.....its not offical, I only know of this cos I talk to the person who is thinking of leaving.

I've been doing the pro/con list of applying.

Pro's
My current position is cushy.
I like my boss, we get along great.
People seem to like me.
I work alone, and not being caught up in others lives and drama.
New position's work load would be triple what mine is now.
New position requires me to go to Shanghai 2-4 times a year.

Con's
I think my boss would get bent and stop being so great.
I would work aside 4 other girls (note I did not say women).
New work load (I'm not afraid of this, I've just become comfortable).
Longer hours, less pay per increased work load.
What if I dont like it? I've then shot myself in the foot.
High turn over in that dept.

That is all I could come up with.
A wonderful soul I work with on the Tech Design Team may a great point this morning.

She said, stay another year(or longer) in your current position and continue to go back to school.
Your current position doesnt require any brain power, and since the schooling would invovle part of my current job, I could get away with studying at work.

Excellent point! While I'm sitting here complaining that I'm losing brain cells from being bored, I SHOULD be taking full advantage of my situation. Then that is what I'll do, and will not apply to Production.

I needed to be reminded of that.
Thanks "N".

Thank You's and Bum Burps.....Yes Bum Burps!

First I just want to send a sincere Thank You to all who have started reading my blog.
Some are old Blogging family, a surrogate Mum,friends, and newbies who have sent lovely messages.

So thank you for reading and the support.

Okay, you may be wondering about the heading of this blog... Bum Burps. Well they are just that.

I was listening to the radio on my Ipod as I commuted to work with our FANTASTIC FREAKIN transit system in Vancouver.. *ugh* and a caller had mention that while living in a shoebox we call apartments in Vancouver, whether it be with a spouse, or a roommate, you really don't have any REAL privacy and in turn, you really get to know your flatmate intimately.

This made me laugh. Cos it is just sooooooooo true.
I took in a roommate 3 weeks ago, and while he is someone I dated very briefly a few months ago, he is proving to be an excellent roomie.
(old followers will remember the RFH (roommate from hell) I had.

Since JV has moved in, my body has started to relax for the following reasons.
1) break in rent 2) male in the house= feel more safe.

Okay maybe I've started to relax a little TOO MUCH!, cos the frequency in Bum Burps have increased. At first they were little "oopies" and funny. But its happening way too often for my liking and I cant run to the loo everytime, so I've started to relax in front of the new roommate.
Thank Gawd he has a sense of humour!

For those who are just learning about me, I have stomach issues. Bum Burps are just a part of my daily life, I've just never had to worry about it, cos I've always lived alone.
In my defence and man am I glad for this. My Bum Burps NEVER , and I mean NEVER smell.

JV on the otherhand, has no bad habits to mention of, as of yet.... yes he's male, and isnt disgusting....yet. (wow male and not disgusting in the same sentence...hmmm didnt think that was possible) I'm sure I'm in store for something. Isn't it hardwired into the male brain to be disgusting at times when living with a female? Sister, wife, g/f, or roomie?
Or do men actually grow up and just save that behaviour for when they're with their buddies?

This may be a little too much information for some of you, but its funny, and if you can't laugh at yourself, someone else should at least be able too.

DATE #1 0F 2009 - Bucky

Went on a date last night with a guy I went to school with 25 years ago. (grade school then he moved)

I called Bucky at 6 ish to see if he wanted to do something.
My roommate was having a date over and I just wanted to give him some privacy, plus if he got lucky, I didn't want to be home.

Sooooo, thinking we'd go out at a reasonable time, as we're talking, I learn Bucky no longer has a licence due to a DUI... sigh, and he lives in NorthVan.
( an hours drive by freeway, or 2 hours by seabus, skytrain and another bus). THREE HOURS later he arrives just about 10:45pm (he left at 8)

My roommate made a very valid point I had not thought of. He said, "No man would travel that distance by bus and not think he's going to get some action".
Ummmm, Not in this life time, its not a "date date" I tell him, he said it did not matter.
Sigh.

We headed off to the pub and caught up on our lives in the last 25 years. Good times!

Back to my place, 3 pints and 3 shots later. Like clock work, my roommate called it. Bucky tried to get some action. Unfortunately, its 3 am now, and transit stops at midnight, I set him up on the couch, where he promptly spilled a full glass of RED wine on my light carpet, and insisted that SALT would take care of it.

Okay, you maybe saying, SALT? What do I know about getting red wine out of carpet.. I never spill the stuff, I drink it.... so salt it is.

I go to bed, and leave Bucky to sleep on the couch.

8am this morning, I'm laying in bed thinking, Awwwww snuggles feel nice.....WAIT A MINUTE!!!! I left Bucky on the couch who is in my bed?

Not only is he in my bed, he's naked! I jump out of bed, turns out he'd only been there a few minutes. I found his clothes in the living room, and told him it was time to leave.
(in the mean time we got hit with another few inches of snow ontop of the 2.5 feet we already have.... just not normal for Vancouver)

Now back to the wine/salt mix that has been sitting for the last 5 hours.
Salt "looks" like its doing its job until I vaccuum it up... wine is still very much there!
Fine! I'll deal with it my way... dulited bleach. Done. Wine stain gone!

So my first date of 2009 was a bust, here's to the rest being better than last night....right?... Right?.... RIGHT?!!!

Maybe I'll have a better date with Devon....

Playing with the Layouts

In the next few weeks, you may see the page change designs several to many times.

I'm not completely thrilled about the choices on here and being new to it all, I'm just going to play til I find something I love.

Please give me your feedback as I change them. :)

First Entry for 2009

Happy New Years to all!

I currently blog on another site, but its a private thing where I rant. This blog will be more positive, outgoing, comical, and user friendly for all that view it.

Recap on Dec 2008.

2008 was entertaining and full of drama. Drama is something I'm not use to having in my life, but I must say I've handled it with grace and maturity.

I've recently finished a p/t university course and passed with flying colours, surprised myself really. Dated a few men (many many more updates on my dating life) and took in a roommate, (previously dated him). SO far so good. he's tidy, quiet and respectful. Unfortunately he'll only be around for 2-4 months. Nice break in the rent though!!! :)

2009 has a lot to offer.
I'm truly surprised at this age, how the personal growth is a constant progress of changes that never seems to stop. Honestly, I though, I'd hit my 30's and have a pretty damn good idea of who I am, what I want from life etc.. But I've learned in the last 9 years, nothing is certain. EVER!!

I continue to grow, and look back and realize that this will never stop, so if I cant beat it.. join it!

I'm in my late 30's now and with the constant changes happening around me, death, life, celebrations, friends, new and old people coming and going from my life, and their experiences, etc all contribute to who I am, and who I will be as I grow older and much wiser as my views on life, the world, and people in general change. Its a progess in the works.. forever!

Things I'd like to work on in 2009:
more personal growth, maybe not anything anyone would notice but myself.
more dating experinces and MAYBE finding someone exclusive to date.
(cos gawd knows its been awhile).
closer and tighter relationships with those I love, and learning to let go of those who do not promote anything positive in my life.

I'll leave you with that for now, and future posts will always have a point to the story.... I hope ;p

Many Best Wishes for all of you and those I come to know here in Blogland.

Samiantha