My friend EvilTwin and I are both online daters. SO who better than to ask for a males two cents.
My side notes are in Blue, all EvilTwin's are in Red.
Things We've learned and observed while viewing online suitors.
If you put “does not do drugs” then tell us you’re 420 friendly, guess what? That’s still doing drugs!
If you’re bald, do NOT put what your hair colour WAS!
It doesn’t matter and 80% of women do not care. Wearing a hat in all your pictures is also a solid tip off you’re bald.
No one wants to see 1 picture of you and 10 of your pet.
ET: I want to add to this: 1 of you/10 of scenery or parents. Or: all your pics contain you and 5 friends so nobody can tell who you are.
What is with the half naked bathroom shots? Seriously?
If you’re going to be half naked at least be on a boat, at the beach, rock climbing, SOMETHING! Being half naked in any pic will get our attention, but it wont keep it.
ET: From a guy's point of view: seeing half naked bathroom shots/cleavage shots ALWAYS work for us. As long as the girl isn't a total train wreck.
Too many webcams shots.
Says to me, you have no friends that could take a picture of you outside the house.
ET: Too many webcam shots, all in the same position, same outfit=lazy ass and you never get away from your computer.
Using pictures that are more than 5 years old and not dated..
Get new ones. A lot can happen in those years.
If you’re over the age of 18 Do Not use your high school pictures…
tells me you have a peter pan complex
Messages us and jumping right into talking about sexual preferences. deleted/blocked!!!!
You’re not 16 get over it already.
ET: If the girl who started talking to me like that and she was hot, oh ya, she'd be my new fav!!
Has “does not smoke” but have pictures up with cigarettes in your mouth or hands….. we’re not stupid
Putting your body type as “average or athletic” when you have no neck, or haven’t seen your feet in a while. Ugh. You’re in denial. If you tell us those pictures are old, GET NEW ONES!
ET: Gotta firmly agree with this one!!
Using pictures that are NOT YOU!
This one I love. One guy msg’d me, and the pic looked really familiar to me. When we started chatting on msn, I asked him how old the picture was, he said it was a few years ago and didn’t look anything like that at all anymore (misleading ya think?)
No shit. When I figured it out, he had used a picture of a friend of mine from an old fan site. I sent him a note and the original un-cropped picture with ME IN IT!!! He deleted and blocked me. But not before I reported his profile.
If you’re 5’8, you are not 5’10 or 6’0 we’ll see that when we meet you.
(recently had a guy tell me he was 5’5, I’m 5’2 and he was shorter than me) FML.
If you’re posing in front of a nice car or boat and NOT in IT, it’s not yours!
Do not try and pass it off as your own. Women are not stupid and we have more connections than you think.
Why lie about your age?
ET: I see way too many "mature" women trying to pass themselves off as being in their mid 20's, hahaha. We're not that stupid, especially when they look like over tanned and weathered alligator handbags. Did you ever see the old lady in "There's Something About Mary"? Ya, you know what I mean.
Have kids? DO NOT LIE ABOUT IT!
ET: OK, seriously? "Prefer Not To Say" is STILL saying yes.
puts “not single/not looking” = cheating on my spouse or am a swinger
looking for “friends” = ya right… on a dating site? How stupid do you think we are?
All women know “hang out” is the new code for booty call. Don’t play it like its not.
ET: I dunno, I tried this one for a bit and it didn't work. Noticeably however, I had a lot fewer emails during the "hang out" switch, lol.
Do not ask us anything you wouldn’t answer yourself.
Adding me to your favorites will not get me to msg you first.
I used to get a lot of these. It just goes to prove my theory that a lot of women are, unfortunately, attention whores. It's funny, when you don't respond to the fav add, they remove themselves after awhile.
This also applies to men I’ve blocked from sending me msg’s without pictures. Adding me will not make me ask you for one, just deleted.
Wearing a wife beater at anytime other than as an undershirt, UNDER A SHIRT will get you automatically deleted.
I got home this evening from a first date with someone I met online. We had spent weeks emailing each other, another week with a few phone calls, so we decided to go out for a beer. I'm so disappointed! He made himself sound pretty lively in emails (and his profile) but in real life he was a real bore. So I practically chugged my beer and said I had to leave early because of work the next day... back to ye olde drawing board!
ReplyDeleteSorry you had a rough night.
ReplyDeleteI've added you to my reading list :)
If you read back far enough, to, "The Good, The Bad & The Ugly" you will read about all my first dates, most that were a bust.
Enjoy! :)
Us internet daters have to stick together! I also wrote a post about what guys shouldn't do: http://lifebeginsat30ty.blogspot.com/2010/01/lbs-donts-for-initial-internet-contact.html
ReplyDeleteI'm sure there's a much more extensive list! I'm starting to get pretty jaded by the whole thing. Thanks for commenting on my blog so I could find yours!