Kick in the crotch. Slap in the face. Take your pick...

I've had the blessing, privilege, awakening opportunity in having no contact with the man I want for the last 1.5 years, for a whole 2.5 weeks. In the past 1.5yrs, we've gone only maybe 2 days at most with not talking to each other. So almost 3 weeks, was hard. Maybe even empowering.

I'm fucking wide awake now. Have been for a while, but now I'm awake while being kicked, or slapped in the face.. take your pick.  I was on skype, and forgot that forever ago I requested to add him. He finally replied with, "who is this?".  *SLAP*

Seriously? It has my picture and full name attached to the add invite. I didn't reply, can simply cancelled the add request. Fuck you. Who is this?

He's been saying all this time he wants to be "friends".  I'm trying to take people at their word.  Bullshit.
So I simply picked myself up, dusted myself off. Raised my head, and got on with my life. I don't have time for these games. I've been playing them for so long.  Normally I would have given him a hard time, but now, fuck it. You want to play the who are you game, then I'll make it easier for you, and you can forget me. Cos you're no longer on my radar.

I joined a new dating site. It's turned out to be a booty call site. It only took chatting to a few men to figure that out fast. Decided a long time ago, I didn't want anything casual. I'm holding out for love. Something more meaningful. Cos, well casual relationships, have a time and a place. I'm no longer in that place.
I've made it clear to one guy I was chatting with.  Although I would love to play with him, but made it very clear, as long as he knew, I was going to be out meeting other men, etc until I found what I was looking for.
He didn't care for that so much, and is now leaning away from the casual card he first presented. We'll see.

That's all for now. I'm off to go do more things that *I* enjoy.